A Hug From God

As a stay-at-home-mom, I am sometimes prone to feeling isolated, lonely, separated from the "real world." When Ben and I decided that I would not work full-time once children came along, I had no idea how emotionally exhausting it would be hanging out with little ones all day. There are so many moments when I could just use a hug, and hear "It's going to be okay."

If you are a parent, you know what I'm talking about. So many different situations arise at every level of your child's development that affect the parents emotionally. I won't even try to make a list of scenarios that I've experienced  personally that have left me feeling helpless, alone, and like I'm the only one going through it. But what I do want to share with you is how God has made himself even more real to me as a result of being a parent and stay-at-home-mom, and how over and over again He wraps His arms around me in a great big hug!

The Bible,which I believe is 100% true and without error, promises us that we can give all of our cares to God because he cares for us. (1 Peter 5:7) Before I became a mom, I was aware of this truth in scripture, but it has come to mean so much more to me. When my children are testing me with their behavior, and not showing progress; when my son is struggling emotionally; when the two of them seem like they will never get along, and I just want someone to talk to, God is there. He cares. He loves me. Some translations call cares "anxieties." And I don't care who you are or what your lot in life is, I'm sure you have anxieties.  

I can pause anywhere at any time, and tell Him about my worries and troubles. Isn't that just like a big hug from God?!

Do you have any favorite verses that bring you comfort? (There are so many throughout the Bible!)

Trading in My Mama Bear Claws for...

Source

Well... it finally happened. 

I watched my child being mistreated by other kids, and I let my emotions get the better of me. It was certainly not the first time that we had been in a situation like this, but for some reason this time, I became so upset with the other children. I never did anything too regretful in the situation, but inside I was so enraged. I was thinking about all the faults of the other kids, and never took the opportunity to teach all of the kids involved. 

Later (after I had time to cool off), I did have several good conversations with Rush about not returning evil for evil (Romans 12:17), turning the other cheek (Matthew 5:38-39)= saying "I have other toys that I can play with, you can have it", and doing to others as we would have them do to us (Luke 6:31). 

I recounted the whole situation to Ben (my husband) that night. He had some great words of wisdom, as always. [Ben's spiritual gift is wisdom!]  He reminded me that I don't have to let my emotions get the better of me. God gave us emotions, but Christ living in me is what should be controlling my reactions to life. During our conversation, I realized that I have fears about how our son will mesh socially as he grows. It is one of those weird tactics that Satan uses on me sometimes; it comes and goes, but when it creeps in, it's very strong. My fear (aka lack of faith) is what caused my poor reaction. How many times have you reacted sinfully as a result of suppressed fears? 

All I could think was "Those kids are so unfriendly and have no manners whatsoever! They are just provoking my son to the point that his social "quirks" come out.  All they can think about is themselves!"

Deep down in my spirit, I know that there is no reason to worry about my son. If I am living the kind of life in Christ that I should be living, those worries won't even seem valid; I will be able to dismiss them the moment they pop into my head. And my response to conflict will be peace-making, life-giving, Godly instruction. 

"We can say with confidence and a clear conscience that we have lived with a God-given holiness and sincerity in all our dealings. We have depended on God's grace; not on our own human wisdom. That is how we have conducted ourselves before the world, and especially toward you." 2 Corinthians 1:12

If I can keep this verse and others like it stored in my heart, then my mama bear claws will not come out at the wrong time. My main weapon of defense should always be the full armor of God, because really I am not just protecting my child from other people; I am defending his heart (and mine) from invisible evil powers. 

"Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.

Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,

and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace.

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;

and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God,

praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication." Ephesians 6:11-18a ESV

Lord, please give me the strength and wisdom to show my children how to respond to conflict. Help me to be sincere, gracious; to control my tongue and my feelings; and to use Your Word as my main line of defense and instruction. I cannot do it on my own. Only you can help me trade in my mama bear claws for Your Armor.

The Cookie Jar of Grace

Happy Monday, everyone!

Just when you think everything is running smoothly, you make a quick run to the grocery store (which is literally 30 seconds away from your child's preschool) right before drop-off time. 

Heading to check-out things were still going well; I had only gotten three items...

My little guy is always mesmerized by the candy display right next to the checkout line (I strongly dislike the person who decided to put that junk right at munchkin-eye-level!), and he loves to stand and stare at all the different types of gum; he picks them up and sniffs them and crinkles the plastic around the gum box. Sometimes I let him pick a pack if I know that his stash is low at home. (He LOVES gum!) 

Right after I signed my name on the credit card box, I look over to him to say, "OK, time to go!"--- and he enthusiastically rips open a packet of gum after I had repeatedly told him that we were not buying any on this day. So I say, "Now that you have ripped open the packet, we have to pay for it. But you are not going to be allowed to have any of the gum and you will not have any for the rest of the day." I instruct him to walk around and hand it to the cashier so that I can pay money for the gum. (At this point, I'm thinking that he is understanding the seriousness of what he has done...) But then he walks back around to me and completely changes the subject, asking about something totally different, but still trying to fulfill some desire of his. I'm also trying to have a conversation with another cashier now, who I know personally, and he is interrupting over and over. I say a quick goodbye to my friend, and hurry the little guy to jump onto the cart so that we can go back to the car to get to school which we are now three minutes late for. 

Feeling negative about the way that I handled the whole situation, (Why do I question my mom skills so much?!) I get in the car after getting the kids buckled and handing them a snack, and the feeling of defeat just washes over me. (It did not help that I somehow caused the panic alarm to go off on my van, and I could not figure out how to get it to stop. There's nothing like feeling defeated and then drawing attention to yourself in the grocery store parking lot with your blaring car alarm to work you up to tears.) Ah, motherhood...

There is a point to this story, and it's not that Rush is a typical four-year-old boy, or that I am a typical mommy. It is that we are all gluttons of grace. 

You know... we decide to go forward with something that we know in our hearts God has not given us "the go" on. We do it---> it doesn't go well---> God smooths it over for us---> and we immediately start asking him for the next thing without really asking for forgiveness and repenting of our indiscretion. 

"God help me to find the right new car." You find one just slightly over your price range and somehow justify that you can make it work. All the while there's a twinge in your stomach reminding you that it was not the best decision. But you quickly move on to the next thing: maybe asking for success in a new deal at work, but using a slight un-truth to entice the potential customer. And we continue this pattern of asking for God's help, knowing what's right, but straying a bit from totally obeying, and then pretending that all is OK (remember, there's no pretending with God). All the while, God is trying to get our attention with his "panic alarm" (conviction). We may regret our choice to "slightly" disobey or even feel embarrassed if others see the result of our mistake. But we do not get serious about repentance. We are over-indulgent partakers of God's grace. We've been caught up in what God can do for us (get us gum), but rarely admit our mess-ups. We continually go to Him with our problems and requests with unconfessed sins. 

I do not love my little boy any less when he messes up. But I do want him to realize and talk about the mistake when he makes one. God does not love us any less when we sin. But he asks us to confess our sins to Him so that we can grow. 1 John 1:9 says, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

I do not want to be guilty of regretting a sin but never confessing and taking action against that sin (repentance). I certainly do not want to be guilty of gluttony. God's grace is a free gift, but I cannot expect to continue to receive it if I continually overindulge. 

Obviously, a four-year-old cannot be expected to understand the gravity of these things, but I can be setting an example by talking through these types of situations. It's only with God's help that I (alongside my husband) will be able to have the wisdom to instruct my children in these principles. But in the meantime, I am amazed at how much God is using mommy-hood to teach me, mold me, and grow me. His grace really is amazing, and I don't want to take advantage of it. 

"The Lord is slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, forgiving iniquity and transgression, but he will by no means clear the guilty." Numbers 14:18

And for a little comic relief: